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Blackcrowe
09-12-2011, 10:31 PM
Varsil Demonsoul pushed open the Green Door and scoured the interior of the Adventurers Collective for the face of the one he sought. It wasn't there. What he did spot was the back of the head that belonged to the face. That would have to do.

Pushing his way through the throng he approached the back of the head that he wanted to address. "Hey Fury, there you are. Listen to this!".

The head failed to turn. From somewhere on the opposite side of it came the less than enthusiastic response of "Mmm?".

"Treasure and magic Fury! You'll never believe what I've found in Fogbough Forest."

"Shush" said the back of the head.

"Never bloody mind shush!" snapped Varsil "Wait till you hear about it. There were three of them you see. Each one bigger than a horse but one of them could fly and the invisible one was made out of solid silver".

"Mmm?" came the disinterested response.

Varsils patience snapped. "Are you listening to me?" he thundered. "Four days I hunted them. And when I finally caught up with them one of them shrunk to the size of a mushroom and jumped inside my ear. I couldn't get it out for a week and then it finally exploded."

The Judge remained facing the other way. "Shush Varsil" he muttered absently. His attention was totally focused on something in front of him.

"For Srythaks sake Fury. Will you listen? It was amazing! I could see right through one of them. Its body was full of gemstones and it had your bloody name written on its forehead. There was a big oak tree under the waterfall that was on fire and it told me riddles about it. What do you think of that?"

"Mmm?" muttered the Judge.

Stunned at the absolute lack of interest in this earth-shattering news Varsil paused perplexed. He peered over the Judges shoulder to see just what was so riveting that he could barely make a dent in the mans consciousness.

Judge Fury was gazing transfixed into a crystal ball.

Varsil peered into the depths of the globe. Inside it he could see fifteen huge ogres clad in black. They were performing some sort of gruesome war dance which involved much stomping about and pulling of faces.

"Oh hell", opined Varsil. He'd encountered this very thing once before, about four years ago. He raised his eyes skyward in an attitude of resignation and breathed a deep sigh.

When he glanced back the ogres were now brutally stomping all over a clan of smaller red-clad ogres. They paused occasionally to throw what, unless Varsil was very much mistaken, looked like an inflated Trossk-bladder about.

Varsils shoulders slumped in defeat. Experience told him the Judges mind and conversational powers were beyond his reach for the foreseeable future. "Forget it." he said, "I'll tell you all about it in a month" and headed for the exit.

As he left the door slammed shut behind him.

"Mmm?" said the back of the head.

Oldschool
09-13-2011, 01:19 AM
LOL!! and nicely done Blackcrowe and welcome back! :)

Btw you do know this is the fiction section don't you? ;)

Antumbra
09-13-2011, 02:05 AM
Fantastic - I laughed and laughed over it. Back of his head indeed.

Badstench
09-13-2011, 02:59 AM
I don't get it. :p

very good... very funny... very true.

I'm currently suffering from Ogre-stomping fixation and not likely to recognise anything else for, as you said Blackcrowe, a month. :o I warned everyone I was going to be insufferable during that time.

Tesability
09-13-2011, 07:47 AM
That's a hell of a re-entry, Varsil.

*spots a little black and gold baby dragon with nose veeeeeery-close to the crystal orb* I'm not gonna stop Fury, if he turns Lunari Empyrea over his knee and paddles her.

She never misbehaved around Pyrond after he did just that, that's for sure. >_>

Young Ned
09-14-2011, 04:38 AM
Hee-hee, good one, BC! :cool:

*spots a little black and gold baby dragon with nose veeeeeery-close to the crystal orb* I'm not gonna stop Fury, if he turns Lunari Empyrea over his knee and paddles her.

She never misbehaved around Pyrond after he did just that, that's for sure. >_>
I wish that worked with cats!

Badstench
09-14-2011, 07:29 AM
Judge Fury hit his fist on the table and exclaimed, "One down, seven to go," before leaning back in his chair with a grin spread from ear to ear.

When his focus shifted from the crystal orb to reality, he saw Hawk appraising him from the opposite side of the table.

"Good viewing, was it?"

Judge Fury nodded. "These new digital orbs are amazing. It's just like being there."

"Being where, exactly?" asked Hawk.

"On the playing field, boy. The magic has improved by leaps and bounds. They have developed overhead pictures now, and miniature apparatus that can record sound as it's sounded. Of course, this isn't so good for the referees, but it makes for good viewing."

Hawk put his mug of hammertongue on the table and glanced at Scout for support. "Fury, What the hell are you gibbering about? I tried to see what you were looking at over your shoulder, but all I saw was mist."

Judge Fury shrugged. "Was Varsil here? I seem to remember hearing him."

"Yes, he was here. He was spouting some nonsense about an exploding earwig and gold pouring out of an invisible silver horse, or some-such. You know Varsil; how he's given to drunken flights of fancy."

At that moment, Bogmuck sat down and plonked a flat piece of leather on the table. It was oval shaped.

"I have kicked this around the room, but it isn't much fun. It just makes a pffft noise and a thup noise when it hits the floor. I don't get it. Mordi said this was the bladder of a Trossk, but I think he was lying."

Judge Fury looked at the piece of leather. "There's no air in it. It has to be blown up, like a balloon."

Bogmuck picked up the Trossk bladder and proceeded to blow into it. It inflated then collapsed with a sigh.

Hawk ignored the display by querying of Judge Fury, "So, what were you seeing in that orb of yours? Varsil said something about Ogres dressed in black and red clothing."

"It's Rugby," answered Judge Fury.

"Is it?" responded Hawk. "And what is Rug-Bee?"

"The best sport in the whole wide world. It's not played in Tysa, sadly. I was introduced to it during a sojourn in Koth. They are mad keen on it in Koth."

"Is it like jousting?"

"Sort of, in that people run at each other and try to stop their opponents from getting past them."

"With a Trossk bladder?"

"A ball."

"A ball?"

"Yes. A ball."

"Is it a magic ball? Is it a ball that hides secret blades? Does it shoot lightning bolts?"

Judge Fury was about to launch into a dissertation of the game of rugby when his crystal orb sputtered into life. "Come sit beside me Hawk. The best way to learn is to watch."

Tetracapillactomist
09-14-2011, 09:42 AM
Well, don't be too put off, for that Srythak's sake... :mad: :)

(Hey, BC! Who you callin' ogres?! Wanna be stomped, or what?... ;))

*wanders off the edge of the map and of the flat earth*

Tesability
09-15-2011, 05:56 AM
I spot an ending swap! What the hell happened to mention of a dragon? o.O

Tetracapillactomist
09-15-2011, 01:52 PM
Don't take it to heart, Tes. All he can see right now is his digital big-screen magical orb - Lunari could zap his hair singed, he still wouldn't notice. :)

Once it's over, he might look in the mirror and wonder "Was there a lightning storm?..." :D